NaNoWriMo Update 3

*VICTORY DANCE*

Yes, my friends, I traveled the seven seas and made it back and wrote a magnificent 50 000 words in 30 days! My novel is not yet done but 50 000 words is pretty amazing! So now I'm quite happy with myself and I am going to partake in NaNoFiMo - National Novel Finishing Month! And just in case you don't believe me, my username on nanowrimo.org is paperdollx - go look at that purple bar that says Winner on it and weep bitches!

NaBloPoMo ends today also, however for me it doesn't because I started on 2nd November, my month finishes on the 2nd December. So You will have another two posts for me until that challenge is complete too and I have no doubt I'll succeed, I've made it that far haven't I?

I'm not going to post an exerpt, for the simple fact is I don't want to spoil it for you. To be honest, I am not even a big fan of it myself, I do plan to edit it to hell before I even consider a publisher. So it'll be in the New Year before you see anything from me, though I will indeed, keep you updated.

I'm off now, to unpack, have some tea and relax, the pressure is off!

*Skips off merrily*

If That's The Way It Is.

I have officially been caught in the web of the Twilight series. After finishing Twilight early yesterday evening, I couldn't wait to get out the door and buy New Moon this afternoon. I've had my head stuck in it since, I am annoyed though with the way the story is at the moment.

Amazingly, it's somewhat like my own life story at the minute. Some people appear to have disappeared and I'm waiting not very patiently or numbly, but in a state of annoyance and wonder about whether they are going to come back. It is their choice but they know I'll be waiting, no matter how awkward it is or how annoyed I was.

That's thing about it though, when someone leaves and comes back, it's never the same. It's why you don't date someone twice, because they never change, no matter how much you want them too. I guess there is nothing I can really do right now apart from wait, the ball is in their hands.

But, you know who you are and I know you'll read this. I still care, even if I say that I don't. Of course I do. And I'm sorry if I hurt or upset you, that is obviously not what I intended. I just am a little confused right now. I thought we sorted it out. But if you want this to end, just let me know so I know where I stand. Thanks.

I'm off now to write, hopefully over the finish line in nanowrimo and read some more of New Moon, in hope that it will get better and I'll stop being annoyed with it.

Twilight

I started reading the Twilight series by Stephanie Meyer yesterday morning. I've had my head stuck into the world of Bella and Edward since then, it really is quite a fascinating story. I love the descriptions of the way Bella feels about Edward, how she describes the electric.

When I read that one scene about her feeling the electric, I had a memory come to my mind. It was a time I too had felt electric. Unfortunately, that electric never went anywhere except the bedroom. Regardless,the memory is one that I cherish, that feeling of lust and desire and well, electric.

I hope to finish the first book this evening and I'll probably buy or lend the second one tomorrow. I'm quite intrigued and looking forward to it. Though I've recently heard bad reports, many people are now going off the series due to the movie release ruining it and the fangirls being all well fan-girly about it. Fuck them, if you like it you like it.

Maybe one day, we'll all find our own Edward Cullen too.

Home.

We all have that one place that we call home. The place we were born and have lived in most of our lives, where our childhood memories our, our young dreams, our scraped knees and broken hearts. There is no place like home.

But what if, you not really by choice, have to move away? You become part of a new set of people, new friends and people you become close to and adopt as a temporary family. It's a home away from home, not because you want it to be but because it has to be. What if you suddenly start enjoying it? It doesn't seem so bad.

I know this because I've done it. I really wasn't ever keen on moving away from home to go to University, unfortunately, life gave me that as a choice that I could follow or I'd not go to University at all. At first, I missed my real home, my family, my friends and the life I left behind and yes, sometimes I still miss it, but not as much. It's not so bad for me because I only live an hour and a half away, home really isn't far, but it's still far enough.

Far enough for me to miss it and at the same time, not. Far enough for bonds to break and hearts to ache. Just far enough. I've grown accustomed now, to my temporary home and I have lightened up and learnt to enjoy it. I guess there is no point moping around all day, you gotta take what's given to you and enjoy it. Otherwise, it's a pretty sad existence.

So regardless, of where you are, or who you miss, or what you no longer have, can do, or feel, just throw caution to the wind and enjoy it and you might actually learn something about yourself.

Take a risk, it's what life's about.

Holidays Are Coming.

You always know it's Christmas when you see that famous Coca Cola ad with the trucks and the lights and Santa drinking coke and you hear the little song 'Holidays are coming, Always Coca Cola'. I saw this advert for the first time this year on Saturday during the ad breaks of the X Factor.

I am totally not feeling festive at all this year, in fact I'm slightly Scrooge like. This could be due to the fact that I have coursework deadlines and novel deadlines to meet before I can even think about Christmas shopping or Christmas in general.

I have no clue what to buy anybody, so if there is something you want, tell me in the comments, or email me - make note, I ain't gonna buy everybody, just those people who know who they are.

What is slightly ironic, is the fact that I tend to sing Jingle Bells all year round. Come Christmas, I stop singing it and get all Scrooge like. Awh well.

Bah Humbug, bitches!

Household

The thing I've noticed recently about my housemates and I is that we've come together more as a household. It was mainly last week, we all helped at the party, we all tidied up and we all went together to the disciplinary and we all told the same story and paid the price for our actions. I liked the fact that we were grouping together for once. Instead of people running off here, there and everywhere.

The good thing is that it has proceeded into this week. Tonight, we all had dinner together and we helped cook and clean. Then my other friend came over and we had yet another water fight, which was fun but we soaked my friend who then had to run off to a romantic double dinner date with his boyfriend and another couple.

We are currently all sitting typing our fingers off, they have an assignment due and I have nanowrimo to keep me occupied until someone attacks me with a highlighter or more water. Hopefully they won't though, I already have the cold!

Pride

It's been two months now since I first upped and left for University and I have to admit, I'm pretty proud of myself.

I've started enjoying University a lot more now and it's been fun regardless of the drama or the formal warnings.

I don't miss home as much, I'm used to it and it isn't that bad because I go home most weekends.

So University is all good and I'm enjoying myself quite a bit. I'm proud of myself, I really am :)

NaNoWriMo Update 2

I made 25 000 words last night and I have to admit, I'm pretty pleased with myself, that's the halfway mark! I know I should have reached it a week or so ago, but regardless, I've reached it and I'm halfway there! (Not living on a prayer though!)

I know this time next week Nanowrimo will be over and we will be either celebrating or saying 'Maybe next year'. Regardless, you have to give us serious brownie points for trying. I have fair hope that I will make it to 50 000 words, as I plan to have serious sprints throughout the week, starting tonight. 5k at a time!

Once you are on a roll, it isn't hard to get the words flowing and especially if you have a plan in mind. You still got to let the characters tell the story their own way though, but you'll get there eventually.

So for now, wish me luck and this blog next week will let you know whether I am a surefire Nanowrimo winner or not.

Alone Together.

Today, I went to a NaNoWriMo meet and met some people from Northern Ireland. It was pretty fun and it got me thinking.

The reason for us all coming together is because we are all writing a novel, not a challenge many people undertake. The fact is, if it weren't for NaNoWriMo we'd all be pretty alone in our novel-writing undertaking and I don't think we'd all make it to 50 000 words if we weren't trying to make it as part of a challenge. By being with other people, we push ourselves to beat them, or match them, or to 'win'.

It's good to know that there are other people who are pushing themselves too, who need encouragement and support to make it and keep those fingers typing. By us all doing the same task, we might be alone, but at least we are together in that. This reminds me of a quote from one of my favourite movie that says;

"So now, alone or not, you've got a walk ahead. Thing to remember is if we're all alone, then we're all together in that too."

So next time you are feeling alone, just remember, there are probably other people who are lonely too and even if you don't know them, you aren't alone because you are together in your loneliness.

Picture Post.

I bought this poster recently and I just wanted to share it with you, cause I'm nice like that :P

A Formal Warning.

So, the disciplinary interview went okay. The woman basically explained some things and asked us some questions. We explained our side of the story and we were let off with a formal warning which is just a black mark against our name. We are allowed to appeal this, so I think we are going too, which is all good.

I'm pretty happy with this result, we could have been in a lot more crap. So, now, we party on and hope that next time, we don't get caught cause god only help us if we do.

Water Fight

Today, my housemates and I had a water fight. The house is soaking, and the carpet even squelching when we walk on it.

Apart from the general wetness of the house, we were all soaked through. Regardless of that, it was the funnest part of my day and possibly my week. We were using boxes, pots, pans, glasses, biscuit tins etcetc. It was just great.

I have the disciplinary interview tomorrow. I'm not looking forward to it, but I'm hoping for the best.

Wrecked.

Last night was eventful, to say the least.

We threw a massive party for my housemates 20th birthday, we had lots of alcohol, including a punch bowl, the house was decorated with balloons and banners etcetc. We had a pre-party at the house, had the party at the Students Union and another post-party at the house. I didn't sleep until 4am.

Needless to say, I was not a happy bunny when I got woken up by Residential Officers this morning who came barging in screaming blue murder. The jist of the story is, we were made to clean our house by 2pm and we've been called to an interview about "Noise Nuisance". The funny part? The music wasn't even coming from our Flat! The Residential Assitant came into our house last night around 1am and kicked everybody out, so the only people left were the housemates and two of our friends who were staying - talking to them was the reason for being awake until 4am.

It's okay though, he dropped us in the shit, well, we're gonna drop him right back in it too and smear it all over his smug little face. Then we'll see how he likes it.

Yes, I am angry.

Samisung

Last night, my gay friend had a dream about me. I was a large phone and I was running away with his coursework and he was yelling after me that he needed it or else he couldn't go to class.

This stemmed from me ringing him 3829147292993 times in order to get him up for class so he ended up dreaming about me. I've no idea why I had his coursework though. Then I started running after him and beating him with his coursework.

If you see a new phone brand called Sami-sung, it's run by me ;P

NaNoWriMo Update 1.

So, I know we're supposed to be on 25 000 words as of yesterday but I'm still only on 9229. This is due to not writing anything in the first week cause of some personal life stuff. But it's all good, I've got determination and plan to type my fingers off today and get at least 15 000. By this time next week I hope to be at least in the 20 000s somewhere.

I went to a write-in yesterday. I didn't see the girls at first but the liaison found me in a wee corner eating a cookie and she recognised me and brought me over. We typed for a bit and played the novel game which had some funny endings with bananas, elves and Walt Disney. Then we typed some more and another person came and we talked for a bit.

I also got the little kit, the wee card and the cutest highlighter ever and a nanowrimo sticker. I was well pleased. Haha. I'm really glad I found out about it because I'm probably going to participate it in every year now, even through all the madnessss. I'm even planning on basing some of my journalism coursework on it this year. Aren't I awesome?

Anyway, that's all I've really got to say about it so far. I would paste you an excerpt but I'm going to keep you in suspense so it keeps me writing :P.

Until tomorrow!

Yes, It's Sad But...

There isn't much you can do about it. When friends make decisions to go away for University, or to take a gap year and travel the world, of course you're going to be sad. Yes, you are allowed to cry and mourn their departure, but eventually, you have to get over it.

I was at a leaving party for a girl who's moving away to Australia last night and all her girly friends and her were crying their hearts out, singing cheesy karaoke songs at each other and hugging each other for dear life. It was heartwarming and heart-wrenching because you know that this girl is leaving behind an entire life that she's spent years building.

It kind of made me sad though. No-one ever threw me a leaving party. I know that I come back every weekend, but it doesn't mean it that it's any less or more difficult for me. I live away from home for most of my week now, I'm actually at home about two days (one entire full one and two halves). It hurts me too, to know that I can't fully participate in my friends lives anymore, I'm barely aware of what goes on during the week even if its nothing exciting.

I'm not going to put down my Uni experience though, because it has been fun as well as dramatic. I figured though, that maybe it's too hard to have a leaving party. It breaks your heart watching the final goodbyes. Maybe my friends and I aren't good at dealing with goodbyes, not that it was a goodbye as I do come back. I guess it's easier for us to pretend that it's all okay because we see each other every weekend and I guess it is. There is a big difference between Coleraine and Australia.

I don't know. I guess my leaving party will be when I decide to move 5000 miles across the world and it'll be a day when we all have to accept that I'm not coming back. I guess we all have different ways of dealing with what our friends choose to do with our lives. It's not all bad either, my friends are coming to join me at University next year. It's not like we can all decide to up and move to Australia together.

Anyway, I'm going to stop myself from feeling sad and wish you all the best wherever in the world you choose to be.

Grin and Bare It.

This evening I'm going out with some of my lovely friends to a nice bar for a quiet drink and/or party. I know it's going to be fun, but I have instinctive feelings right now that its going to turn into a coupletastic snog-fest.

You know when people fancy each other? Then alcohol gets involved. It kinda turns into a, oh look you're really pretty *kisses* type thing. Well I know that two girls going tonight have crushes on two guys that are going tonight and vice versa. So, instinctively, I know that its going to be a snogathon and I'll be there going 'Well, this is great'.

I'm not going to feel sorry for myself because what's the point? I could drink myself silly and have to be carried home, but I'm not like that. So what I'm really going to do is grin and bare it and hope that some random hottie turns up for me, or ask my friends to share their men, or just steal them away from them and tell them they can do whatever they want with the guys when they go home together, but for now, can I have you please?

You can never really predict what's going to happen though, so hopefully the night turns out better than I'm expecting it to be. :)

I've Nothing To Say

I apologise for this but absolutely nothing to tell you guys lately.

Today, I went shopping. That's about it. I also handed in my coursework, yay me.

:D I bought some new tops and socks.

I seem to have a sock obsession as of late. How random is that.

I'll have more to blog about over the weekend I am sure.

Right now, I am off to watch The Parent Trap with my gay lover who is getting his haircut (he wanted me to add that just so he feels special ;P).

Still Lacking In Motivation

I know my posts are really unexciting as of late, but I'm tied between doing coursework, keeping up with a social life and nanowrimoing my brain out.

So today, instead of boring you with tales of nothingness and coursework and instead you can have a quote, rather appropriately, from someone named Swamiji Paramahamsa Nithyananda. I found the quote here. So here, it is:

Don’t keep thinking of what happened yesterday and what is going to happen tomorrow. Live in the moment and every situation will seem like the time of your life.

Today, I Lack Motivation.

I've just spent several hundred hours staring at my computer screen, hoping some form of essay about Pride and Prejudice will form itself in my word document, without me really having to think about it. Unfortunately, magic documents like that don't exist and I have to type them all myself.

I have absolutely no motivation for doing any form of essay at all today. All I really want to do is write a few thousand more words in my nanowrimo novel. I'm not allowing myself to even open the document though until I get some form of essay taking shape.

I'm quite thankful that Bebo isn't working for me right now otherwise I'd be creeping on your uncle's brother's monkey's turtle by now and then having a realisation that I've no clue who this person is and what the hell am I doing on their page.

So, if you see me online, you might want to tell me to stop posting blogs, stalking NaNoWriMo profiles and get on with my essay, or do it for me. Either way, it would be useful :P

Lifes too short.

As you all know, I've been on the down and out as of late until a some friends helped to put my feet firmly back on the ground. I'm ready to hit it, jumping, running, or flying.

I used to think that life was the longest thing you'll ever go through and maybe it is, but at the same time, it is a short and wonderful thing and we should all be living it to the fullest. Even if that means having to say goodbye a thousand times or more. Even if it means loosing all the people in the world that you love so dearly. At the end of the day, we all end up dead.

I know that is probably really morbid and one of the worst things to ever say, but it's true and we just have to accept that. We should stop taking life and people and everything in it for granted and realise that we are truly blessed to be given everything we are given, regardless of how much we don't want, need or like it.

It's not all bad. I'm sure a lot of us have wonderful friends and family and opportunities being given to us left, right and centre. So why don't you hop on board that new plane and arrive at that new destination. You never know, it could be the making of you.

Just be sure that you thank someone for it, show your gratitude for life. Even if it means hugging a friend to show your love, at the end of the day, it will all be worth to die a happy person, knowing you lived life the way you wanted too.

Life is short. Make the most of it.

Feet Back On The Ground.

Recently, I haven't been feeling the greatest and I did really get myself upset about a good few things. My friends are pretty awesome though and are able to pick up on these things immediately and come and say, 'Yo, bisnatch, what's the craic?' and help to sort me out.

So, it's safe to say my feet are firmly back on the ground and I brought some clarity to my life. I know what I've been doing and why and now I know what I can and can't do and how to sort myself out. It all finally makes sense :)

So, with that, I really must shoot off, I've a suitcase to pack, a self to dress and feed and a train to catch. University, here I come.

I'll see you tomorrow :)

The Power Of X.

This is going to sound completely random and ridiculously girly. However, when you are writing a text, or an email, or just something on msn and you see the message followed by an 'x'. For example, 'Sweet dreams xx'. Do you wonder what it means? Generally, X means a kiss. So a goodnight kiss is acceptable, but who is suitable to give you an X?

A family member?? A friend? I usually sign with an 'xo' A kiss and a hug. I usually hug people you see, so that suits me. What confuses me about this, is if you like someone and they sign it with 'x', or as been with me recently 'xxxx'. Four x's, that is four kisses for me. It's extremely girlish of me to read into it, but does it mean that the guy wants to give me four kisses, or he is just being friendly? Or is he feeling guilty so overcompensates with his x's? How do you know what is appropriate and how do you know when its just friendly and not romantically inclined?!

I know that's random, but it just bugs me. If anyone can solve this problem, do let me know!! :P

Time To Up The Ante

Today, someone left my life. They hadn't really been in it much and I thought that they had stopped caring. I found out I was wrong, they still cared. It's just I had pushed them away and so I told them to go. To ride off into the sunset and live life the way it should be lived. I know that person will most likely read this blog. As I said, I wish you well and I will never say goodbye, just Good Luck :).

As upsetting as this has been to me, it seems to be the way life works. People come and people go. Eventually, saying Goodbye, or Good Luck becomes a natural process. At Primary school, you say goodbye to your friends and move to secondary school. Then at the end of Secondary school, you say goodbye for University and at the end of University, undoubtedly you will have to say Goodbye. It's not that you want all these people to leave your life, it's just that they do because we all go our separate ways. Life goes on no matter how many people we lose or how many more we meet.

To be perfectly honest though, I am sick of saying Goodbye. I just wish someone would come into my life and stay there for a while. Someone who will lie beside me at night and hug me tight and let me know it's all going to be Okay in the morning. But I'm 19 and finding someone who is likely to do that is about as possible as it is for McCain to win the presidential election. So I guess, it's time I upped the Ante. Time I stopped saying Goodbye and pushing people away, time I held onto the people who I cherish and stopped being a bisnatch and possibly stop being a whore.

I don't know how I'm going to do it, all I know is that I want to and sure as hell, I'm going to try. So if you're my friend and I've been neglecting you, I apologise profusely and I'll make it up to you in the following weeks, I promise. For now though, I hope you are well and I'll speak to you soon.

Wish List.

I just wish you would let me know that you still care.
I wish that you would care.
I wish that you would try.
I wish you didn't live so far away.
I wish I didn't live so far away.
I wish you would stop judging me.
I wish you would already.
I wish you would stop making me sick.
I wish you two would make up your minds.

Yeah, I just wish.

Obama Wins.

Most of the world knows by now that America has voted Barack Obama to be the 44th President of the United States of America. Most of the world has a "I don't care" attitude because they don't think that this will/does affect them in anyway.

I can't confirm that it does, but since America is the backbone of a lot of the world, especially the UK I do think that the changes made in America will eventually envelope the rest of us. And I don't mean envelope us in a bad way.

Last night I sat until 3.30 am watching the votes be counted. I was nervous at first because McCain got the lead when the first projections came in, but eventually Obama had 300+ versuses McCain's 100+ and so I retired to bed knowing come morning who the 44th President would be.

I am not an American but I do love America and by just sitting watching the news coverage it allowed me to feel a part of it, a part of somewhere else, somethinge else and part of history. I think a lot of us will remember this for the rest of our lives. America is now ready to accept having an African-American President, the first ever in the U.S. America is ready for change.

Isn't it time we were too?

When You Grow Old.

So, I was on the bus today on my way into town and these two old ladies got onto the bus. They were just normal old women but they had the coolest hats. The hats were white, fluffy and covered the entirety of their hair, you would almost mistake it for hair it was that white.

At the following stop, another two old ladies got on, and they both had white hair. I was quite amused cause it was like white hats v.s. white hair. The Irony is, they all had Marks and Sparks bags. It was like, if they were all friends, it would be what Carrie, Miranda, Samantha and Charlotte would be like when they are 95+.

It just made me wonder, when I grow old, will I have white hair, or a white hat? What do you think?

What Not To Say.

So, the other night I was out at a party for Halloween and it was great fun. The house was big, the alcohol was flowing and the people were partying. I was having a great time just mingling with all my friends and the new people I had never met before.

I went upstairs to use the bathroom when one of the bedroom doors opened and a guy was sitting on the floor. He startled me, but he said Hello and introduced himself. Let's call him C shall we? So C had been put into this bedroom, which had no working lights by A1 (not using names to protect identity). A1 had told C to calm down and stay in that room until he felt better, but C was bored and needed water which is why he opened the door when he heard me wandering around. So I went and got some water for C and sat down and started chatting to him.

We were chatting about Anime and if I, being a girl, had seen any. I told him that I had as my new housemate had introduced me to a few and my exes has shown me some as well. Then he started hugging me cause he was cold. I know that sounds like a ploy, but you have no idea how cold that house was. It was a big old victorian-style house with single glazing and heating that takes 400 hours to start working. So it was cold.

So there we were, C and I, in a room with no working lights, hugging and chatting. C was quite intoxicated (alcohol, you know?) and he was talking in a half-Irish, half-Scottish accent. He was telling me I was a "Beautiful Lass" with "Really smooth skin and smooth hair". I started laughing at him in his silly little accent and then he said "Oh no! I think me penis jumped up". This made me laugh even more, which made his 'penis jump' more. In all my life, a laugh turning someone on is the last thing I expected. Though, I've been told before that I had a dirty/evil laugh. I don't know how that works.

So C's penis jumped up and he was quite handsome. He was training to be a fitness instructor so had some nice pecs and well, I wasn't going to refuse. Blame the alcohol if you want. So there we were, C and me kissing and hugging and letting hands flail around. Then he asked 'Do you like kisses in the ear?' I'm sorry, IN THE EAR? I mean, I can deal with ear nibbling and stuff but why on earth do you want to shove your tongue IN my ear? Needless to say, it didn't do anything for me, except make me think he was a weirdo.

If that wasn't bad enough, we were going at it (again, hands only) and he stopped again and said "Do you like anal?" I was like "No thank you, it's an exit only". To this, he replied "It's just me ex lass, she shoved her ass in me face one day and said go on and I was like what do you mean go on? And then I realised and I was like oh, really? It wasn't really something I enjoyed." What, a man who doesn't like anal, are you sure? I was but then we stopped for a while because well, I wasn't exactly excited after that. When we got going again, he was all "I want to bend you over". Clearly, he did enjoy anal. Shame, really.

So next time, my friends, you meet a beautiful lassie and you get the chance to give her some action, I suggest you don't ask about ear kissing, or anal, or even talk about your ex-girlfriend. Reason being, it's a total turn-off. As for C and me, we have spoken since, he said he didn't remember much. Maybe I'll forgive him, for his pecs and the eventualality, made up for it ;)

November = Challenge Time!

So, I know it's been a while and I am an awfully bad blogger for not posting regularly. I hope you all had a good Halloween, I know I did and I will be posting about those events in the not too distant future.

For now though, exciting news! November appears to be the month of creativity and writing challenges. So, here we go. This month I have decided to try two challenges.

The first one is called NaNoWriMo. This stands for National Novel Writing Month. The basic idea is that you have from the 1st November to the 30th November to see if you can write a 50, 000 word novel. At the end, you get the satisfaction of having written a novel (it doesn't have to end at 50, 000 words) and you get a certificate to say that you have participated and past, that is if you submit your novel for word count verification. I have always been interested in writing my own novel and have had several failed attempts due to lifes constant interuptions, so this month, with the Nanowrimo counter and support of other Wrimos hopefully I'll get somewhere! Wish me luck! If you are also participating then let me know and we can help to motivate each other! If you're interested in participating go, here.

The other Challenge this month my friends is called, NaBloPoMo. This stands for National Blog Posting Month. The idea for this being, that you make a post on your blog everyday for a month, including weekends. I thought this would be a good challenge for me to undertake as I keep neglecting my blog. Since I only started this challenge today, my Blog Posting Month will end on the 2nd December. I sincerely hope I find some interesting stories to tell you lot during this month and I hope I can up my readership by the constant blogging. Yes, this post does count as my first one, because I say it does so ner :P. If you are also a blogger and would be interested in this challenge you can go here for more information!

Well Wrimos and Pomos, I wish you all the best of luck this month! Perhaps we can all go celebrate if we acheieve our goals, yes? Drinks on you!